Free Advice

Has it been ten days since I posted? Where did the time go?

Oh yes, I began the paperback tour for Water Ghosts.

In Seattle, where I just spent two-and-a-half great days, I had an "author escort" the first day. She picked me up at the airport and drove me to my first reading, a couple hours away, then made sure I was safely ensconced in my hotel. In those four hours in the car, we had a lot of time to chat (um, four hours, in fact). One of the topics that came up was the lack of advice available for authors going on the road. Many are just launched on the road with no prep, no idea what to expect, no talking points, or tips on what to say/not say in interviews, etc. So I'm going to fill in with a few of the things I learned.

1. If you live in the Bay Area, make sure you know which airport you are flying from.

This point is laughable to anyone who doesn't live in the East Bay, but a real issue for those of us who do! OAK and SFO are about 30 minutes apart, and it's equally likely with each trip that you are flying out of one or the other. A friend told me he's even taken public transportation to the wrong one. I don't know anyone who uses just one of the airports exclusively. With two choices, you usually go for the cheaper option. Anyway, I arrived an hour early for my flight, only to discover in checking the time and airline, I'd glossed over the airport. I jumped back in the car, raced to SF, got through security like it was nobody's business, and ran barefoot to the gate. The plane was still there, but the gate was closed and they weren't going to open it for anyone.

Needless to say, I missed the flight. This set off a chain of unpleasant events and likely connected events, including the loss of my jacket and falling in a pothole, etc. Which leads me to Tip # 2:

2. Make sure you know which airport you are flying from! (yes, that ending preposition is bothering me too, but let's stick to the pertinent details)

3. Invest in a good deodorant.

This too might be a Bay Area thing--allegiance to some aluminum-free, all-natural sort of deodorant that actually makes you smell like you've rolled around on the floor of a men's locker room. If you are going to be running through airports trying to catch flights, then nervously rushing into bookstores to give readings, at least be sure you don't smell like your dad's old stained undershirt. Like they say: You never get a second chance to make a first impression.

4. Um, bring a pen to signings.

I brought pens. I brought like five pens. But I couldn't find a single one of them in my purse, so, you know, put them in an accessible place!

5. Smile.

Smile, smile, smile. This is awesome. It's your baby, hitting the world!

6. Make sure your landlord pays the utilities bill before you go.

Or heck, even while you are gone. Just make sure they are paid, so that when you get back from your amazing adventure, there isn't a note from the Municipal Utilities District saying your water is going to be turned off for non-payment.

Because that's really a downer.